It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I got dropped off at my house at like 1030. Woke up hugging a street cat I've never seen before. Ended up drinking 260 oz of beer. 65 types. Then went out after blehhhhhh
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
