So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
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