I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
