We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I just used my VA prescription bottle of xanax to get a military discount at the liquor store. I win.
Only you could get away with that.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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