the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
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