so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
