I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
