somebody snuck up and got me drunk
You can't motorboat a personality
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Randomize
