He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
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I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
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I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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