i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
His idea of role playing was him wearing the halloween mitt romney mask while I gave him head
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
