Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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