if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
I've never been so drunk at home. I just sat on the toilet playing with toilet paper for ten minutes, I almost made a paper crane.
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