More tranny stories later!
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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