If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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