She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
