I molested 6 butterflies tonight
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I got married tonight..
I'd like to first of all congratulate you on your marriage. Secondly, probably one of the best drunk texts I've ever received. Unless you were sober, then that text was awkward.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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