We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
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