OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
