youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
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