Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
