I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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