# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Randomize