Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
three of my fingers are bleeding and the only thing on my phone rn is a google search of 'Allison Janney'
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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