Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Enroute to my place eta 6 mikes...estimated time until intoxicated? 45 mikes. Commence the timer.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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