Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
My mom just looked at me while watching the fireworks and asked if it reminded me of how I felt after sex. I'm so uncomfortable.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize