He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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