Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize