tonights recap: old cokehead freind proposed in the middle of a country bar to his trash girlfriend, saw ex-fuck who now has star shaved into his head and another with his gf, and ex-bfs best friends crackin jokes about who would fuck me first. NEVER COMING HOME AGAIN
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
Randomize
