U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
You should frame my arrest warrant.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize