...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Randomize
