You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
