Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I skipped work to stalk him.
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Randomize
