Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
