Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
there is puke in my bra ... again
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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