i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Drunk is not a location!
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
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