She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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