This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
