Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
