There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i woke up to 115 texts from him all saying "do you love me??"
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
