I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Still dying that you shit outside
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
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