He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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