Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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