I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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