I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
what day is it and did you see me today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Randomize