You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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