hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Randomize