i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
