So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
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