It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
