We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
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